F*ck, That's Delicious: All American Food (Full Episode)
Ah. Oh, man.
This reminds meof when we were kids.
Used to go the restaurantwith your parents,
down a...soda,eat fries.
"Get the...out of here.""Get the...out of here."
"You guysdon't understand me."
"You can go...off.""I'm out of here."
I used to hate sitting therewhile they finished their meal.
...hate that.
Like, damn,grown-ups are weird.
Why are theysitting around?
And talking.
Just three guyshaving a burger.
[ Fanfare plays ]
Bronson: Whoo! USA, yay.
What people might not knowis that there's a fourth version
of James Brown's"Living in America."
Al: Oh, my. Oh, my.
He mentions Lioni'sin Bensonhurst.
Jesus Christ.
This is the Americanfood episode.
-Ah!-This is wild.
Bronson: We're not talking abouthot dogs and apple pie
and any of thatother bullshit.
[ Laughter ]
I'm talkingbig mother...steaks.Al: Oh, my God.
Meyhem: It could be a drink.It could be a shake.
It could be a sundae.
It could be smeared on the wallon a dartboard,
and I could put my face in it.
I just want cookies and cream.
Bronson: All kinds ofice cream creations.
Is there any wayto cool it off
without giving everybodytuberculosis?
Big Body Besis uniquely American.
You won't encounterthat anywhere else.
One time, I ran outof a Chinese restaurant.
I was running so much,I threw up down the block.
I lost everythingI stole.
I can make a hookout of anything,
anything at all,anything at all,
anything at all,anything at all.
-What's up?-Hi.
Bronson: All the thingsthat could come
from the mindsof a...country
that's incredible...
-[ Laughs ]-...Big food...
-This is wild.-...hearty food.
-Oh, my God.-Ridiculous.
Bronson: This is American food,mother...
We like to do things stupid.
Meyhem: All right.
[ Door bell jingles ]
Bronson: I've never been in"Fiddler on the Roof,"
but I reproduced itin my living room
for my grandfather one timeto make him happy,
and thenhe didn't like it.
My man's sister used to goon the road with "Riverdance,"
and we used to just chillin her crib all the timebecause she was gone.
I don't believeeither of you.
-I'm super ---Nah, I swear to God.
Both of those things happened,which is crazy.
♪♪
Bronson: To start offthis American-food...fest,
I have enlistedmy very good friend
and co-conspiratorRachel Wharton.
James Beard Award-winningwriter,
also a New York Timesbest-selling writing author --
Co-author.Co-author of"...That's Delicious."
Rachel isan American-food expert.
Look at all the things.
The Couch is when you addwaffle fries
and all kinds of shiton it.
Truly an American place.
[ Laughter ]
There it is.
Bronson:We're at Cherry Valley.
♪♪
This is a...favoriteof everybody.
People travel fromall over the land for this.
It's an after-hours spot.
It's alwaysafter an activity --
after you smoke a blunt,after softball,
late-night deliciousness.
You get this,and then you go home.
♪♪
Wait, help me.Help me. Help me here.
This stuff is always,like, too many choices.
Al: They make a sandwichon toasted garlic bread.
What the...?
Yeah, let's just go in.
Come on, let's ordera bunch of shit.
I like braces.They feel good.
-How are you, guys?-How you doing, man?
Bronson:How you feeling?
Very nice.They're all gentlemen.
Oh, and a lady --gentlemen and a lady.
Rachel:So now there's more choices.
Yeah, there's some thingsnot on the menu.
That's why you have to stepinto the realm.
-See, he knows.-I know one thing for sure.
We're goingto need a Fat Cat,
and I'd like to addmozzarella sticks, please.
Excellent.
I'd like a Leanboy as well,please.
You have to lower your voicefor that one.
[ Laughs ]
Bushman with turkey baconand pepper Jack, please.
Great combination.
Wait, is your Cowboy, like,legit country-fried steak?
Yeah, legit.
I want the Cowboy.
Bronson: This is going to beridiculous.
This is a huge piece of fleshright here.
-Mozzarella.-You got it.
Bronson: They name thingsafter people they love.
They're honoring themwith a sandwich,
and I think that's oneof the highest honors.
See, that's America.
Al: They gave Verizona sandwich.
They might have got a dealon their cable.
[ Laughs ]
♪♪
I like this.
That's the --that's the stuff.
People dress up Jamaicanbeef patties all the time.
You could dress up a knish.
Wait, why don't youask them to do it?
All right.Let's do it.
I'd like one more thing.
Can we cut a knish open
and stuff itwith pepperoni and mozzarella?
You know,you're the boss.
You're the best ever.You know, you --
And jalapeños.
Have no fear.
Oh, my God.Look at those big sandwiches.
Meyhem: Those arethe working-man's sandwich.
In additionto the big sandwich,
which is quintessentiallyAmerican,
then they've addedevery possible
immigrant to the United Statesto the menu as well.
You have tostones here,mozzarella,
beef patties...Beef patties...
...knish.
I mean, that's Queens.Yes.
That is Queens.
♪♪
Here we go.Thank you very much, guys.
-I appreciate it.-No, I appreciate you.
-No, thank you.-It's an honor.
-Sandwich.-Sang-wich.
Rachel: [ Laughs ]
Leanboy -- nicethinly-sliced honey turkey
on a gorgeoussemolina roll.
Mmm.
It's like --[ Muffled ] That's whatI'm talking about.
Here, have that.Yeah, I want that.
My lord,look at that Fat Cat.
It's heavierthan my chain.
Burger, onion, pickle,mozzarella stick.
It's just...up.
Al: I don't think I could shoveone more thing in there.
We'll...putJimmy Hoffa in there.
[ Laughter ]
Oh, look at that stance.
Rachel: [ Laughs ]
That's how you bitea Cherry Valley sandwich.
[ Speaks indistinctly ]
Rachel: Man,I love chicken-fried steak.
This is like three cultures --Texas, Italian, Mexican.
♪♪
Mm.Bronson:This is it, huh?
Yeah.
Bronson: Knish.Meyhem: Ooh.
...stuffed with mozzarellaand pepperoni.
This, I did for you.
This, you did for me?
This is --this is for you.
This is kind ofthe big sandwich
taken to its, like,American conclusion.
♪♪
...ridiculous.
Yeah. Oh, my God.We have so much sandwich.
My lord.
Al: This is wild.
-Terrorizing.-I'm the only one still eating.
-You're right.-[ Laughs ]
Bronson:You're the last man standing.
Woman.Rachel: Woman.
Woman standing.
[ Siren wails in distance ]
Bronson: Where are we?What is this?
Al: I have no idea.
This is miniature golf?
Indoor.And what's the escape deck?
Is it an escape room?
I like escape rooms.I just went to one in L.A..
Did you escape?No.
[ Laughter ]
I'll tell you aboutthe escape room in a minute.All right.
Powers: Welcome.You're in New York City's
only theatricalminiature golf course.
Are you ready for this?
-Yeah.-Why is this theatrical?
So I used to work on Broadwayfor a living,
so I decidedto add a story.
You weren't in "Le Mis"?
-No. No. No.-Okay.
So anyway, you in?
-Let's go.-Grab the coins. Let's go.
Since you want to askall the...questions,
you stay there.
[ Laughter ]
Woman:Mayday. Mayday.
Meyhem:What the hell is this?
Oh, we're on a boat, see?
[ Steam horn blows ]
See, we're on a boat?
♪♪
Body: And nowyou're in Brooklyn.
Now, you just happento be a Brooklyn pimp.
♪♪
I can hear the ladiesscreaming now.
[ Laughter ]
Body, you want to go?
Finesse.Don't use a hammer.
-Mm.-...
-Oh.-Oh.
Meyhem:Dawg, that was crazy.
You have to usea gentle hand.
I think it's much more funthrowing it.
[ Laughter ]Al: Oh.
-[ Grunts ]-Power.
Al: Bing, bing, bing,bing, bing.
Bronson: This is it,to win the game.
...[ Laughs ]
Al: Yo, ahoy.
-Oh.-Ball in the water.
Bad idea.
Bad idea.Bad idea, Meyhem.Okay.
Bloop. Bloop.
Good shit.
You're behind a treeright now.
[ Laughter ]
Bronson:You taking a piss?
Nah, I'm making sureeverything is smooth...
Okay....everybody.
I'd like to go, please.
Body: I'm not going to lie.I had a great time, brother.
-That's good.-Thanks, man.
Take care.See you.
-Good luck with that case.-Thank you.
Body: [ Laughs ]Bronson: Go back to the spot
and get higha little more.
♪ Whoo! Whoo!
♪♪
♪ Getting hot, yeah
♪ So hot in here
♪♪
Did you knowthat Joaquin Phoenix
was brothers with River Phoenixthe whole time?
I did never knew that.
Nope.
-Hey, hey, hey.-Hooray.
Ooh.
♪♪
Meyhem: [ Laughs ]
Al,take two steps to the left
and lift your leg.
There you go,your other leg.
There it is. That's it.
To the beat.
[ Mumbling ]
Body,what are you...
What are you doingover there?
[ Coughs ]
What time are we supposedto go to Lioni's?
♪♪
♪ She's a pretty girl
-How are you, sir?-What's going on?
Hey, how you been?
-Wow.-There's 150 sandwiches.
Bronson: There'sa big choice here.
So I think I'm going to gowith two sandwiches --You got it.
...the Marty Scorsese,with white American.
Do we put peppers on that,or what do we do?
Does it justgo like that?
I got hot.I got sweet.
Can you do hot and sweet?Hot and sweet.
Mix 'em up.Yeah, please.
Also, I got to getmy favorite though,
the Mike & the Mad Dog,please.You got it.
I need a Marissa Tomei,Bruno Sammartino also.
One of each?
Got to see which eggplantis better, you know?
♪ I've gone aroundwith her ♪
♪ She's got me inan awful spin ♪
Mmm.
Paul:I tell you, the 74,
those are some goodmodifications.
You like that?Yeah.
Thank you, brother.I like that.
Throw it up there.
-Oh, cool.-Wow.
-Oh.-Pride and joy.
Now this is howyou eat...lunch.Paul: This is how you eat.
That's how you order --two sandwiches.
-Right.-That's right.
Oh, my lord.
...Mike & the Mad Dog, bro,
stuffed pepper, mozzarella,
veal cutlet.Veal?
The heart and soul of Lioniis Italian-American heroes,
a different sandwichthan your traditional deli.
This was a sandwichthat you would make
in your houseon a Sunday night
with leftover sausageor meatballs.
That's why I likeItalian food a lot.
They always puta lot of ingredients
in whatever they make.
They're not subs,and they're not hoagies.
In Bensonhurst, in this store,they're heroes.
Oh, my.
The name comesfrom back in the day,
if you could finish it,you were a hero.
[ Belches ]
Look at this thing --
sweet sausage,hot sausage,
hot pepper,sweet peppers --
the...Martin Scorsese.
Paul: We have a saying here,"You didn't really make it
until there's a sandwichnamed after you."
Oh, my God.
You feel like doing"The Macarena"?
-[ Laughs ]-...
Meyhem:Gonna have the battle ofthe aubergine right here --
the war of the melanzane
with sun-dried basil,fresh ricotta.
♪♪
And now...Try this other eggplant --
Marissa Tomei.Bronson: Oh, my lord.
You want to get some layers?Look at that...
Like, yo,this is special effects.
Jesus Christ.That's half of a sandwich, no?
Like, there's a whole otherhalf of that.
What the...?
-Crack.-This is insane.
-This is...unbelievable.-No, no. This is insane.
Both eggplants are excellent,but Tomei is the winner.
That was unbelievable,man.
The bread is ridiculous.
-It's good Italian bread.-That shit's massive.
Bronson:One half is for now,
and the other halfis for whenever.Body: When you wake up
from your haze nap,covered in drool and ashes.
[ Laughs ] Oh!Covered in piss.
[ Laughs ]
♪♪
You wouldn't know thiswas here from the front.
You have to, like, know.
They don't do commercials.
They don't do no advertisingin the paper.
The way they did it in '95,they probably still do it now.
The quality don't change.
That's why I...with here.
♪♪
Bronson: ...
[ Laughs ]
I'm going to probably needone of those Martin Scorsese
with the modificationsto go, please.
♪♪
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Al: This isa serious restaurant.
Nobody ever split a billhere in their life.
[ Laughs ]
I mean, this is sucha special occasion.
We're over herein this special room
in this unbelievablebuilding.
Michael:This is the cellar room.
This is where we age things,good and bad.
[ Laughs ]
Thank you for having us.Nice to see you.I'm glad to have you.
Welcome to Porter HouseBar and Grill.
Here we go.
Look at this.Meyhem: There we go.
My goodness.
Shrimp, lobster, crab,
an oyster plateau.
Hamachi.Can I just say something,'cause I don't want to --
Look at howthey're peeled and ready.
What? What?I've been to some places,
and they don't wantto peel it...Oh, come on.
...especially a hot shrimp.Are you kidding?
They want me to getthis shirt filthy.
No way.And I refuse.
[ Laughs ]Goodness gracious,please,
can you guys indulge?
Oysters with warm baguette
and some butter,and champagne --
It's the only way to live.
-They're so fresh.-Wow.
-Oh, wow.-Julia Child taught me that.
What a woman.
King crabis so delicious.
Oh, my God.The crab legs are so sweet.
It really doesn't needany sauce at all.
♪♪
Two-pound lobstersare what we do.
It's the perfect balancebetween the size of the shell
and the amount of meat.
Meyhem: Boop!
♪♪
Al: Oh, that's amazingright there.
Bronson: You're gettinga mixture of warm water,
cold water,river water.
-This is everything to me.-Yes.
Meyhem:Like, this defines life.
♪♪
Michael: And this isyour cote de boeuf.
Bronson: That's a double cutfor sure, right?Yes.
That's a steak for two.
This looks like an amazing,fun place to work.
-Yes, it is.-I'm overwhelmed by meat.
-Whoa.-Real-deal wagyu Miyazaki beef.
This looks likea $1,500 steak.
That used to be a decentone-bedroom in Forest Hills.
[ Laughs ]
All our beef is dry-aged.Yeah.
So you can smellthe aroma.
[ Sniffs ]That's the beautifulmineral tang
of dry-aged beef.
Want to cook a littlesomething with me?I'd love to.
We just use coarse salts.
There you go. Don't be shy.Don't be shy.
And that forms your crust.Do you want the meat cold,
or do you want itroom temperature?I go cold.
Really, what the...?Why?You know why I go cold?
Because I crank upthe heat.
Michael: So this is1,800 degrees.
Yeah, it's pretty hot.
I get to char iton the outside
and controlthe internal temperature
with the least amount ofloss of juices from the meat.
See how that fat,it starts sizzling instantly?
I'm seeing it.Yeah.
I'm seeing it.I'm hearing it.
I wouldn't mind standingin front of this all day.
Well --
I'd stand over herea little bit though.
[ Laughs ]
Al: How's it lookin'in there?
Like strictly business.
Are we ready for a little --a little pasta?
You have your...swim trunks on?
You ready to dive in?I'm ready to dive in.
Michael: Tagliarini.A little Tagliarini.
-Oh!-Parmigiano-Reggiano.
Oh.You know what these are?I know you know.
Oh, I know what that is.I know.
White trufflesfrom Alba, Italy.
Oh.Nuggets of happiness.
Enjoy.Buon appetito.
♪♪
You don't even talkduring this, man.
You just...go.
♪♪
Wow.
This is, like,the highest apex
of penne with butterfrom a child's menu.
This warms our souls.
Then the additionof truffle --
It's...phenomenal.
Oh, man.Shout-outs to Italy.
They're all aboutthe extra flavors, man.
♪♪
Bronson: Wow.That's divinity, divinity.
Oh, my God.
I need a pinkie ringto drink that shit.
It's like chewing on wood.
[ Laughs ]
Michael:Okay. You got everything?All right.
Everything to the table, guys,everything to the table.
Bronson: Oh, shit.Look at this...shit.
It's crazy.
So this is a hot platter,incoming.
Here's your cote de boeuf,the roasted duck --
-Mm.-...Japanese wagyu.
Bronson: Oh, my God.
[ Applause ]
This is beautiful.Thank you.
Standing ovationfor this masterpiece.
Please, it's timeto start eating.
Cote de boeuf,dry-aged prime rib eye.
Yo, that's unbelievable.
This cote de boeuf,oh, man.
Meyhem: Those onion ringslook like hula hoops.
Buttermilk onion rings.
Trying to take my shit,son?Body: [ Laughs ]
Michael: The roasted duckwith figs and blood oranges,
a play on, like,orange duck.I like that.
Enjoy.I like plays.
That's...crazy,the duck with blood orange.
And this is reallythe king of the table here,
the Japanese wagyu.
Oh, my God.It melts.
It's meltingright in front of you, right?
Isn't it crazy?
Unbelievable.Delicious.
Thank Godwe're in this room,
so we can makesome...noise.
[ Laughs ][ Screams ]
[ Laughs ]Man.
Al: Everything hereis incredible.
Bronson: I'm astonishedby this food.
Body:This is a feast.
♪♪
Michael: 1908 Madeira.
Al: 100 years later.
Ah, like a slow-madedulce de leche.
Ah.A little blizzardof desserts,
devil's food blackout cake,
banana cream pie,coconut cake,
ice cream sundae,classic New York cheesecake.
Body: That cakeis going to go down.
Ooh, ridiculous.
I'll have the cheesecake.
Thank you.
Al: Behind the back.
♪♪
-I like it.-That's heavy, you know?
You're a man's man.[ Laughs ]
Nestle me in your bosom.I love you, man.
[ Laughs ]I love you.
♪♪
Al:We ate good today, boy.
Bronson:We ate good, did we ever.
Body:Nobody tried the sundae.
That's for Elijah.
[ Laughs ]
For who?
[ Laughter ]
Can you hand-truck meout of here?
♪♪
Bronson: A stone's throw fromthe old Triangle Social Club,
right on the outskirtsof the West Village,
this is Morgenstern's,an ice cream institution,
a truly American ice cream spot
not just for the classics,
but where dessert innovationsjust happen.
This is yuzu juice withthe Yamazaki Japanese whisky.
-My lord.-Whoa.
-Whoa.-You like that?
-Damn, that -- that's crazy.-Mind-blowing.
Bronson:This is Nick Morgenstern.
He makes my ice cream dreamscome to reality.
Sorry.
Look at this little puck,the easy lover.
Smooth raspberryice cream,
pink-peppercorn jamwith raspberry,
a nice dark-chocolateouter covering.
-Oh.-Mm!
Bronson:He's like a genie that comesout of the bottle in "Aladdin"
and just...makes ice cream crazy.
We're here to makesome serious flavors.
♪♪
Don't you love gettingthe ice cream
made for you at the counter,and then it gets presented,
in some real...special shit?
The most importantice cream sundae in America,
the Hot Tin Roof,
invented in Nebraskain 1916.
Dairy Queen has a version,but we use the best ingredients.
Come on, man.Come on, man.
We don't have a lot of food
that's originalin the United States,
but when you see that image,you know that it's American.
Oh, boy.That's...crack.
And we have a hugemenu selection of things,
and I say this is themost important thingthat you can eat.
Brings you back to beinga little-ass kid, right?
♪♪
Oh.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
[ Laughter ]
[ Shaker rattling ]
♪ Boom, boom,boom, boom-boom ♪
♪ Boom, boom-boom,boom, boom-boom ♪
♪ Boom, boom-boom,doo, doo-doo ♪
Is that citrus?
Nicholas:This is a vegan mango.Yes, there is citrus in there.
-Oh.-That's so beautiful too.
Yeah, I don't even wantto destroy it.That looks unbelievable.
Nicholas: Get in there.Naval orange, pineapple...
Mm.
...raw lemon segmentinside
for a extra boost.
This is an orgasmic plethoraof flavor.
-That shit is unbelievable.-It's good, right?
Whoa.
The White Bronco Sundae.
Action is going todo the honors here.
-Douse it.-Douse it.
This is raw-milk ice cream,olive-oil cake,
fried Brazil nuts.
This white-chocolatesituation.
Craziness.
So I think this actuallysegues nicely
into some of the flavors thatwe're talking about for today.
-Oh!-Action, come around.
Mmm.
Nicholas: So we just slicedthis Japanese eggplant in here,
soaked it in oil.
This is a single-originchocolate from Maracaibo.
Wow.
This is the most expensivechocolate you can get
in the United Statesright now.
Super high cocoa content,low sugar,
so it basically cooks
at the same speedas the eggplant in the oven,
and then we're going toturn that into ice cream.
Why eggplant and chocolate?What made you think of that?
The body that it givesto the ice cream --
so smooth,so luxurious.
There's nothing elsethat tastes like that,
and they makea new flavor,
like a churro --dipping it in some chocolate.
Real amusement park.
Here we go.
Body: Whoa. Damn.
The type of dessertthat could invoke sin.
Nicholas: But look at theselittle pockets inside.
It's, like, just turned into,like, a little custard inside.
Oh, man.
You get the silkinessof that eggplant,
and the chocolatedumped all over it
is like when youleave the brownie ina little too long.
It's pretty next-level.
I'm starting all these problemswith her.[ Laughs ]
Bronson:I'm in the inner sanctum.
I just did thisout of the womb.
I just was like,"This is going to be weird.
I don't knowwhat's going to happen."Very interesting.
American food --It gets a bad rap as a cuisine.
When you think of it,you think of...supersize,
all the fast-food chainsthat are American.
Meyhem: We also push thingsto the limit.
Like, where elseare you going to have
chocolate-coveredeggplant?
That's an American mindthat created that.
How do you bag upthe first one
without letting metaste that?
I got to take careof the product.
[ Laughter ]
Apparently,ice cream has to cure.
I didn't...know that.
Mmm.
Holy shit.
This is...mind-blowing.
This is a...Whoa.
Forget about hotdogs and apple pie. Action Bronson and his crew are eating all across New York City to celebrate delicious foods that are uniquely American. From a lavish multi-course surf and turf spread, to loaded Italian hero sandwiches, to a knish stuffed with pepperoni and mozzarella, to inventive ice cream creations, Action and his friends are eating the best that American cuisine has to offer. F*ck, That's Delicious is back for Season 4! Tune in Mondays at 10pm on VICE TV or on vicetv.com. Subscribe to Munchies here: http://bit.ly/Subscribe-to-MUNCHIES All Munchies videos release a full week early on our site: https://video.vice.com/en_us/channel/munchies Hungry? Sign up here for the MUNCHIES Recipes newsletter. https://www.vice.com/en_us/page/sign-up-for-munchies-recipes-newsletter Check out http://munchies.tv for more! Follow Munchies here: Facebook: http://facebook.com/munchies Twitter: http://twitter.com/munchies Tumblr: http://munchies.tumblr.com Instagram: http://instagram.com/munchies Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/munchies Foursquare: https://foursquare.com/munchies More videos from the VICE network: https://www.fb.com/vicevideo